I was skimming through the notes on my phone where I keep quotes from Lilly. She always manages to say something that makes me smile. Many times, when she gets me to react, she starts to point at me and says something like “That’s the look I’m talking about”. With her usual enthusiasm, it gets me to smile more, and the more I smile, the more she keeps telling me that I am giving her the look. And round and round it goes.
The most recent quote from Lilly happened just a week or so ago. Lilly is always teasing me about being old. She comments about me being born in the dinosaur age and she makes comments about my “white hair” and “white beard”. I enjoy asking her if I am “cool”, particularly when I am wearing something new. Lilly’s comment to me was in reference to both of these topics.
“Daddy. You are not young and cool. But you are old and awesome!”
I’ll take that! In the fall, Lilly offered me these words.
“Mommy helps me all the time. Especially when I get stressed. She is like my own stress ball. Except she squeezes me.”
Over the summer Lilly offered up this great analogy.
“Daddy. I want to lay on top of you like butter on pancakes. You are the big pancake and I’m the little butter.”
I am getting close to being able to make a calendar with a Lilly quote for each day. And there is nothing that pleases me more than when Lilly talks about her Mom. When she does, I can hear in her voice how much she is in touch with her feelings. Lilly is very aware of who Lilly is and she is never afraid to show it. So when Lilly brought home a project from school, I couldn’t resist hanging it up. It was a cutout construction paper “replica” of herself. A paper plate for the head and a large shirt/dress. On the shirt was a lined sheet of paper titled “Lilly’s I AM Poem”.
I AM sweet and Love to Laugh
I wonder when I AM going to get a dog
I hear dogs barking all the time
I see Angels all the time
I love to play outside.
I pretend to ride a horse
I feel really Happy
I touch my dog’s fluffy fur
I worry my dog will be left in the sun
I cry if someone calls me a mean name
I AM sweet and love to laugh
I understand my Daddy loves me
I know Angels are real.
I dream of seeing Mommy
I want to save animals
I try to help solve problems.
I AM sweet and love to laugh.
I know that this is a very simple poem. Although it shouldn’t surprise me, it does, when I read her words. This little girl of 10 years old shares a wide range of feelings. She is so honest with herself and honest with her place in this world. “I am sweet and love to laugh”. I couldn’t describe her any better.
If all of us would write our own “I AM” poem, how would it sound? What words would we use? How would we describe our place in the world? When I read her poem, I think about how proud Lori would be of Lilly. I know how proud Lori IS of Lilly. And then I wish I would have the opportunity for Lori to share back with Lilly. What if Lori wrote her own “I AM” poem? What would it have sounded like?
Fortunately for me, Lori always finds a way to answer the questions I have for her. Sometimes they are subtle and sometimes they are down right obvious. In this case, it was literally written on a lined sheet of paper. In a notebook. Titled “I AM Thankful”.
There is no question in my life,
What I AM most thankful for,
My Family, friends and people around me,
I truly do adore.
I AM thankful for the Birds,
Meeting on my windowsill,
They greet me with their songs,
that spread feelings of good will.
I AM thankful for my freedom,
But I also miss this too,
For although I can enjoy some,
I can’t do all that I used to do.
I AM thankful for the good days,
We enjoy those most of all,
And even if it’s one good hour,
We make sure we have a Ball!
I AM thankful for my husband’s recliner,
For I spend most of my time there.
The recliner I’ve tried to rid for years,
has turned into my favorite chair.
I AM thankful for this time,
to discover who I AM,
to prioritize, what matters most,
And understand God’s plan.
I AM thankful for my husband Matt,
He is truly a patient man.
He’s always there right by side,
When I can’t... I know he can.
I AM thankful for meeting all of you,
You are my inspiration,
It’s people like you who’s strength and love,
Can truly change a nation.
I could go on and on,
For all I AM thankful for,
From laughing with people to enjoying outdoors,
There’s truly so much more!
I AM thankful for my little girl,
Who God has gifted me.
I AM hopeful she will always know,
My love is more than she can see.
And although my life has changed,
And I have a handicap or two,
I AM thankful I still believe,
That miracles come true.
I could read Lori’s words and Lilly’s words over and over. I enjoy the similarities. I enjoy seeing that words that were chosen by a woman of 40 were used again 5 years later by a girl of 10 years old. Lilly says she loves to laugh. Lori says she loves laughing with people. Lilly talks about her love for playing outside. Lori enjoys the outdoors. They both refer to love more than once and while Lori refers to God, Lilly talks about Angels. While Lori talks about birds and singing, Lilly talks about dogs and barking. The people in their writings are both referred to by name. Lilly mentions her dreams and Lori talks about her belief in miracles.
Today I think about Lori. I know the impact she has made in the lives of everyone she has met. I see first hand the impact she has made on Lilly. In just a short period of time, Lori found a way to leave an imprint on a small little girl. She has shown her how to love life and how to love the people that surround her. And for the lessons in life that perhaps Lilly was too young to learn directly from Lori, Lori has found a way.
September, 2015: “Daddy. I love you. I love Mommy. And I love our life together.”
Lilly expressed herself in her “I AM POEM”. Lori expressed herself in her “I AM THANKFUL POEM”. For me? I AM just lucky to have them both.