The two of us walked into a restaurant and were seated. The waitress came by and introduced herself. She was non-descript in appearance, her inflection was low, her energy was average at best. Her expression was neither happy and fun nor was it angry or frustrated. She was what was expected from a waitress. She was doing a job and she was performing between the extremes.
“Can I get you something to drink?” She looked at me and I in turn, looked at Lilly. She turned her attention to Lilly. “Can I get you something to drink?”
Full of energy and enthusiasm, Lilly popped her head up from the notebook she was drawing in. Likely the start of a new scene just coming to life. “Yes, please. May I have a Sprite please?” The smile on her face bright, her eyes squinted just slightly, her love of life shining through.
“Would you like that in a kids cups with a straw?” The waitress questioned back.
“Oh, yes please, thank you.” Lilly smiled more and then slowly returned to her drawing.
When the waitress returned shortly there after, she happily brought Lilly her drink. Her voice increased in volume, her energy was up. “Here you go sweetie.” She was alert and engaging, she was doing a job and she was doing it well.
The drawing was coming to life. Anime, the current theme of most drawings. The characters were all carefully crafted. From specific fashions to full on back stories. One from Germany, who had 2 brothers and 1 sister. Another, the oldest at 15, had a twin sister. Dozens of characters and all of them had their own story. And all of them in color. As she stopped to show me, she filled me in on the details. “Dad, I didn’t tell you, but last night I had a dream about these two dresses. See this one, it’s fancy and yellow and the other one…. oh, Dad, I just can’t remember, oh I can’t remember what the other one looked like. I will just keeping drawing and it will come back to me.”
All of them looked really good to me. There were probably 6 or 7 of them on the page already. The page was full of color, full of energy. Some were playing instruments, some were dancing, others were talking to each other. It looked like a party.
When the waitress returned to take our order, her smile was bigger, her attitude was remarkably better. I credit Lilly for her change in demeanor. And I credit Lori for showing Lilly how important it is to be happy, positive, friendly and polite.
If you knew Lori, you saw how she positively impacted everything around her. And she did it with a smile. She didn’t have to force it or fake it, she didn’t have to pretend. What you learn quickly is that the smile she is sharing with you, is natural, it’s just a part of her. And that smile can spread from one person to another and can change the attitudes of everyone who encounters it.
It didn’t matter if she was talking to a close friend or a family member. It didn’t change if she was at work or at home. She shared her smile with everyone regardless of who they were or how they met. And these people who got to experience it first hand, usually shared it right back with her. Not just because of her smile, but because of her outlook on life. Her belief that life was a gift, a gift to be shared.
We recently went to see “The Greatest Showman” at the theater. Lilly loved it. She loved every bit of it. She loved the characters, she loved the songs, she loved the energy, she loved the story. We now listen to the soundtrack relentlessly.
“Who is your favorite character?” I asked Lilly. So many to choose from. The two daughters, younger than Lilly but still girls. They suggest to their Father that the museum would be more inviting if everything wasn’t dead and stuffed but instead was alive.
Maybe Lilly would choose the famous opera singer. She is fancy and glitzy and steals the show with her songs. Or perhaps the trapeze artist. She is fun, gets to fly high in the sky and wears her own dazzling costumes.
“Oh, I love the Bearded Lady!” Lilly is decisive in her choice. All of the characters were in there own way, misfits in society. They all were trying to find their place in life. But the Bearded Lady is the one who sings about trying to fit in. A song about accepting who you are. A song that is happy and a song that is proud. The character sings loudly, clearly and with authority. The song is called, “This is Me”.
This is me. Lilly sings the words to the song. She belts them out and I am not surprised she relates to this song. “I am brave, I am bruised, I am who I’m meant to be, This is Me.”
Lilly is who she is meant to be every day, because her Mom helped guide her down a path that opened her up to all of the advantages of living life to the fullest.
I was talking to my Mom about the movie and transitioned into talking about the other PT Barnum story, the Musical, and specifically about the song “Colors of My Life”.
Mom had played the song for Lori years ago and that song remains on Lori’s Ipod. A favorite of hers that I hadn’t thought about for years. So I played it again and I listened to the words.
“The colors of my life, are bountiful and bold.
The purple glow of indigo, the gleam of green and gold.
The splendor of a sunrise, the dazzle of a flame.
The glory of a rainbow, I put ‘em all to shame.”
Lori was all about her colors, both figuratively and literally. Literal colors were chosen as she decorated her life. Take two or more colors that you wouldn’t expect should go together and next thing you know, you have a homemade wreath, or a painted flower pot, a Christmas tree skirt, a drawing a sketch or a painting. You might have a flower basket, a flower garden, a flower bed or a vase of fresh flowers. You could end up with a picture frame, a knitted throw, a pillow or couch cover, a shower curtain or a baby blanket.
Put the color on paper and you might get a note with a drawing, or a handmade card. It could be an invitation to a party or a program for an event. You might find yourself looking at a sketch or a water color painting. Or you might find some combination of any of the above.
There are times when I think that my memories of Lori are more vibrant than what she actually was. And I am sure at times they are. But the reality is that Lilly is so much like her Mom, that I can’t even imagine what she may do next.
Just as the waitress was influenced by Lilly’s smile, by her positive, joyful attitude, countless others were influenced by Lori.
Both Lori and Lilly are similar to the misfit of the Bearded Lady, the character Lilly loved most and the song that seems to sum up her personality best. This is me.
And it is of no surprise that the song “The Colors of My Life”, is found on Lori’s Ipod.
When I hear the song, I find myself thinking about a picture I have of Lori. She is with a group of people, all dressed up. I think it is from a college black tie gala. I’m guessing this because everyone in the picture is wearing black and white. Well, almost everyone.
One person is wearing the “Colors of My Life”. And I’m sure if the picture could speak, we would hear her say “I am who I’m meant to be. This is me”.
